The Better Part of Communication

UV 1360/10,000 The Better Part of Communication
Wherefore, my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath:
James 1 v 19
This uni-verse gives us an insight into the secret of effective communication. Communication which is about building bridges of understanding with people is not only about speaking but about listening. The better and greater part of communication is listening. Listening should precede and follow our speech. We need to be quick to listen, slow to speak and slower still in getting angry. A major part of our lives should be spent listening and a lesser part in speaking. A good communicator needs to be first of all, a good listener. The ears are the only organs made in such a way that they are always open. They are the mouths that feed the mind and heart. We need to hear God and apply His word. We need to listen to people and assimilate the wisdom in their words. We should spend time analysing God’s word as well as the things people say. Pause and poise is more important than pace. The primary way the Lord increases us in wisdom, knowledge and understanding is through hearing His word.

Words are powerful. God used words to create the universe. But words used in excess or in an untimely way can be destructive. We need to listen to understand the words of others, to understand their feelings, motives and thoughts behind the words they speak. We should listen not only with our ears but with our eyes and with our spirits and minds. Jesus listened with sensitivity, empathy and compassion. He could hear the afflicted woman’s need and touch even in a pressing crowd. He listened to and did not ignore children. We have a natural tendency to give more importance to speaking than to listening. We have a natural tendency to speak swiftly. But once a word is spoken it cannot be unspoken. The damage is done. When we speak less and listen more, our words tend to be wise and valuable. We need to take time to formulate our thoughts and chose our words wisely such that they do not hurt or harm others or harm our own prospects. It is often our egos that cause us to speak swiftly and angrily without listening.

We need to be slow to display our emotions in our speech. We need to contain our anger and not spill or spew it out. Like reins control the power of the horse to make it go where the rider wants it, we need to have an invisible rein on our tongues and our temper. We need to develop some filters so that our speech whenever it emerges comes out as pure and distilled wisdom, so that our words are apt, effective and beneficial to the listeners. The time others spend speaking in vain we should use to gather and store wisdom that will come in handy during our conversations. We need to pray for wisdom and grace to be able to control our tongues and our temper. Scripture says that we will be judged for every deliberate and careless word we speak. We should not allow anger, bitterness and pride to cloud our understanding. Instead of anger, our words should display the love, grace and goodness of the Lord. The mouth cannot speak what the heart is not full of. The mouth speaks due to an overflow of emotions from the heart. If we store positive thoughts and emotions and deal with the negative ones, our communication which should consist of two thirds of listening and one third with speech will be effective, useful and beneficial to all.

Prateep V Philip